Reclaim it in 10 seconds without making it a scene

You made the point at 10:12 and the table stayed quiet. At 10:19 a colleague said it again, more slowly and with a sweep of the hand, and the room nodded as if the thought had just arrived from nowhere. You have roughly ten seconds. If you say nothing, by lunch the room will treat the idea as his. Object clumsily and you become the person who turned a routine meeting strange.

The habitual responses are to swallow it or to blurt "that's what I just said." The first hands over the idea. The second can spend your standing in the room, since research on the likability penalty has repeatedly shown that the same correction sounds assertive coming from a man and demanding coming from a woman. The lines below avoid both traps. They tie the idea back to you while letting the conversation carry on.

1. Halfway through the meeting, he restates your idea as if it were his own.

The urge is to snap, "I said exactly that five minutes ago."

Better: "Happy that point got through. "Picking up where I left off earlier, the next move is this."

Why: you claimed the idea in one clause, not a complaint, and then did the one thing only its originator can credibly do, which is take it further. The group credits the author without being asked to pick a side.

2. The chair credits him by name

Smiling and letting it pass is the easy route.

A stronger reply: "Thanks, that's exactly the point I started with. Mark's framing brings in the timeline angle, and I appreciate that.

It works because it is concrete, gracious and tough to argue with. You claimed your contribution and handed him something useful in exchange. No one can fairly call that territorial, and the chair is likely to be more careful next time.

3. Now it has occurred for the third time in a single month.

The urge is to call it out in the meeting, once and for all, and do it harshly.

Stronger: catch him afterwards, just the two of you, and say, "I've noticed my points register better when you echo them. Would you mind saying 'as she said' the next time you do that?"

Why: you offered him a phrase that costs him almost nothing and puts the attribution on record. Most people will accept it, if a bit sheepishly. Someone who won't do that has made his position clear to you.

4. Your boss did the repeating

The urge is to say nothing at all, since he is your boss.

Better, in your next one-on-one: "When I brought up the vendor issue, it only landed once you repeated it. From here on, I'd prefer to start with my recommendation. Could you give me some pointers on how I'm presenting it?"

Why: you stated the pattern plainly and asked for help, which is the form of feedback a manager is least likely to resent. You also let them know, courteously, that you noticed.

5. Watching it start to unfold for a colleague is its own kind of recognition.

Walking away from it is the tempting option.

"Before we continue, let me return to what Priya said, since I believe that's the answer."

Why: lifting someone else's point costs you little and models a habit for the room. Once the next idea is yours, that habit will already be set in place. Women backing each other up in meetings can change a room faster than most policies.

The principle that ties all five together.

Reattach your name to an idea by building on it, not by defending it. Getting defensive points backward and invites the room to act as judge. Building looks forward, and groups tend to follow whoever is pointing ahead. Not a single one of the five lines places blame on anyone. They just make the record accurate, which is a reasonable thing to want.

Save this one for quick reference. You'll probably reach for line one before the quarter wraps up.